Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Post Nasal Trip

Good evening dear reader(s),

As you may be aware, I have recently found myself a bit under the weather, & therefore have not had the strength to update my beloved (by me) blog.  I am sorry, but being this awesome takes a lot of energy.

So...what has has happened since I have fallen ill?  Well, quite a bit.

Just before the wretched illness dug into me, I read an article that named Reno as one of the top forgotten vacation destinations.  The article goes on to explain how Reno never bothered to plan for Indian casinos or the rise of the Mega Resorts in Vegas.  It also goes on to say that Reno probably should be forgotten as the downtown area has taken on a "shabby" feel & the hotels and casinos are in disrepair.  I wonder if the author of that article is psychic and has been inside my head.

In related news, Reno finally banned the homeless from sleeping on the city's sidewalks.  I wonder if they thought 30 strung-out bums sleeping 3 feet from the arch on Virginia may have contributed to a "shabby" feel.  I would support this ban, but it has had unintended consequences.  It has caused the homeless to become more mobile.  Now I have to dodge strung-out homeless people on bikes who try to play Frogger against the traffic.  I sincerely hope they continue to win.  May they get the high score, because I don't want to be driving the car that ends their game.

I think Reno should host a homeless convention.  Years ago, Reno powerful believed conventions could save the city.  Well, why not have a homeless convention?  Reno already has a huge homeless population, not to mention the Reno homeless seem to be on the cutting-edge of the latest homeless fashion.  Did you know that the Reno homeless introduced the rolling suitcase as replacement to the shopping cart?  It is true.  Reno homeless had the foresight to recognize wheel-locks on shopping carts years ago & made the switch.  Besides, shopping carts are SO 1996!  Reno has also been at the forefront of cheap motels and brain killing drugs for the past decade.  Come on Reno, land that convention.  It just makes sense.

Not that I have anything against the homeless, just the strung-out meth heads & level 3 sex offenders that are everywhere you turn.

So, on a happier front, Hannah & I decided to look at Christmas lights tonight since I could almost breathe for an hour or so.  We drove all over town & actually saw 2 or 3 houses that were good.  That is twice as many as last year.  Sadly, the days when cars would stream through Hidden Valley to look at every house in the area lit up are long gone.  There are 1 or 2 die-hards, but that is about all.  We still had fun, I just hope I didn't screw up & prolong my illness.

Speaking of my illness, I believe I have a sinsus infection.  That is right dear reader(s), don't cry for me, I know it is shocking to find out someone so amazing has been stricken with such a terrible illness.  Do not lose hope, this afliction hasn't taken me yet, & there is something you can do.  Just send a check to me for $365.  For just a dollar a day, you can help Josh through this horrible illness, & maybe buy himself a nice flat-screen tv or a laptop.  But act quickly, because I said so.

Well my dear reader(s), I am off to the land of sleepy time now, where sugar plums and nutcrackers are flung into the firepit for their insubordination.

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